K I S S I N G!
by WLiiAfanatic
Summary: OneShot. Recess isn't always the best time to find the love of your life.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own The Fairly Odd Parents, or the characters used in this story. But I own a really awesome wireless mouse. In your face, Nickelodeon!

**Author's Note:** I'm ba-aack! This time with what might just be the shortest one-shot I've ever put on the site. I didn't even want to bother submitting this when it was originally written, but re-reading it now made me realize that it was actually pretty good. At least, compared to some of the things I've submitted in the past. It doesn't exactly fit in with my earlier fics, either. But, whatever. It's always fun to get a new perspective on how Cosmo and Wanda met, right?

So, enjoy!

**K-I-S-S-I-N-G!**

"Get away from me, you disgusting loser!" Blonda shouted as she frantically flew away from her latest suitor. That's all relationships ever amounted to in elementary school; chasing and fleeing. Especially for Blonda, who not only had her stunning, prepubescent looks, but was also the future heiress to the half of the Big Daddy garbage fortune. She was used to being chased by now, and usually her feeling was just for fun. This time, however, the classmate with the crush was definitely worth scurrying from. Unfortunately, Cosmo was quite the flyer himself.

"Aww, it was just a little present. I thought you'd like it!"

"You twisted your _spitty,__chewed gum _into a baked potato shape and stuffed it into my beautiful hands!"

Cosmo stopped, clearly displaying a feeling of rejection. "It was a heart."

Blonda turned around. "It was a heart," she mocked cruelly. The classmates nearby began to giggle, and a crowd began to form around them.

"Listen, Cosmo," the young girl began, louder this time, "you have _got _to be the ugliest, smelliest, _grossest_ boy in this _whole, entire school_. I wouldn't have a crush on you if you were the last boy in Fairy World!"

The audience laughed out loud at Blonda's harsh words, which pleased her, despite the tears gathering in Cosmo's eyes. She knew those kids would be eating out of her hands for the rest of recess. And she couldn't get enough of it. For as long as she could remember, she wanted to be an actress, and the ability to hold onto any audience was the first step in the process. Once she could hold on to the viewers, she could do anything!

"But Blonda, I love you!"

Blonda shuddered, and turned to her audience. How quickly children can change their minds! Within seconds, they were chanting, "Blonda and Cosmo sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Blonda with a baby carriage!"

While Cosmo seemed pleased by the thought, Blonda looked nothing short of horrified. "Stop!" she screamed, but the crowd was relentless. "Stop it! Please, stop!" Tears were forming in _her_ eyes now. As much as she loved attention, she hated being laughed at. Didn't everyone?

After what seemed like hours of taunting, the bell finally rang. The audience flew quickly inside the school. When they were all gone, Blonda fiercely lifted Cosmo by his shirt color and practically hissed at him, "If you _ever_ do something like that again, I'll tell my daddy all about you! And he will _not_ be pleased!" She threw him down so he hit the ground and flew into her classroom.

Cosmo sat on the ground, stunned. Sure, he was used to girls calling him disgusting, but they'd never been as mean about it as Blonda had. Or as willing to inflict physical pain as Blonda had. Cosmo quickly learned that Blonda was a _very_ strong little girl. He decided that someone who used their strength to crush people's dreams was not worth his time.

But, still, he couldn't help feeling so heartbroken.

From across the playground, another young girl flew over to Cosmo and offered him her hand to help him up. "I'm sorry my sister was so mean to you," she said.

Cosmo sighed. "It's okay. I guess I..." He trailed off mid-sentence when he got a look at this girl. She was like Blonda, but her hair was pink and more shiny, and her eyes were even more sparkly, and her clothes looked a lot better on her slender body.

"I've never heard anyone say they loved her before. You really _do _like Blonda, don't you?"

Cosmo felt dizzy as he placed his hand in hers. "Who?"


End file.
